I Am, You Are

Sometimes your presence is like rays of sunshine,

Unexpected and welcome,

Strong enough to stick to my skin even as the wind tries to wedge its way in 

Strong enough to immediately warm me, outside and in 

And it takes everything in me not to curl in its direction, 

And fall asleep in its rays 

As I dream of eternal summers that winter can’t chase 

Sometimes your love is like the sun, and I drink it in desperately, 

Desperate as I feel for the sun on those winter days where it breaks through the clouds,

Desperate for sunlight, I settle for the cold world as long as it allows you to shine just for an hour, 

You are worth bracing the winds for. 

Sometimes your love is like the sun, 

And when I can’t feel it, I find it in other things, 

A comforting warmth through a mug of tea, a hug from a friend, a cosy night in, 

When warmth kicks out the cold and lets my muscles settle in, 

No more bracing, no more tensing and thinking of survival, 

Just curling into calm and letting the warm spread until I melt into rest. 

Sometimes your love is like the sun, and what a glorious sun it is. 

And it unlocks new beauty in all the earth’s face, 

Illuminating the bluebells and African violets that reveal their secret sparkle under your rays, 

Creating new hues of blues and fuchsia that poured straight from heaven’s gates, 

And I know you see the mosaic of springtime like a stained-glass window as the earth meets your gaze 

Delighting in the rainbow reflecting your glory back at you 

So what about me? 

If you clothed them in such glorious splendour, I have to wonder what you see in me,

For I am so much more than iridescent petals that carpet the forest floor, 

I am a sanctuary of colours my spirit is only starting to explore

As your presence shows me more and more what it means to hold you inside 

What it means for you to breathe life into my dying body over and over until I’m grazing eternity 

What it means to share your secrets with ears that listen, eyes dying to see beyond the grey horizon 

Painting colours with my lips I can barely capture in description, trying to capture your beautiful mind in a moment or an instance 

Trying to explain the shape of emptiness and its infinite expanse, somehow not just filled but overflowing since your presence moved in 

Trying to make it all make sense, to myself, to the world dying as I was, and I never seem to find it, 

Never seem to find a box to put you in, a story you can contain, a reputation that fits with the God I see in my brain, 

You are so much more than the world could fathom, so much more than a conversation could contain, 

You just are, it’s in your name, and every other living thing simply mocks this with its temporal existence, 

You are. You always were, you always will be, you never began so you won’t ever have to end, 

What a mystery it is that you chose to put I Am into me.