Depths

Deep calls to deep. 

My depth to your depth. 

I’m desperate for you. 

You don’t operate in the shallows, do you?

I try to use you like a drug, prayer like a quick fix. 

A hit of the Holy Spirit to get me through it. 

And you don’t reply. And you won’t reply, as long as it’s use in my heart. 

You’re not a toy to be played with. 

You long to hear the musings of my heart, no matter how harsh, how negative, how hopeless, how defeated, how detrimental. 

You hang on every word I say, even the complaints and the aimless wandering. 

You act when I speak. You are moved by my words. 

You actually see me. 

And when the deep in me calls to you, knowing I’m swimming over a trench of my own pain, you answer me. 

In the rocky floors of my heartbreak, you meet me with beautiful visions of restoration. 

When I feel like I’m sinking, you pierce my chest with life and I breathe underwater. 

You give my eyes vision to see clearly. 

You make me able to live, even thrive, in hostile environments. 

Dancing with sharks and finding weightlessness in the deepest valleys. 

Somehow, it’s all woven together in the tapestry of your will for this world. 

You are a deep God, able to mourn with my suffering, cry as the pain is inflicted upon me, cry as I inflict my pain onto others. 

Gasping for air and finding none. 

And yet you delight in it all, not because you don’t care, but because you know how the story ends. 

You can see the rest for my soul. The healing of my bleeding heart. The successful surgery. The new life. The freedom. 

You took me to the depths to show me how to be weightless. And when you take me to dry land I’ll know how to maintain it. 

You never fail.